Nobody sends a memo when the job starts leaking into the pickup line. The signs appear as small habits: the phone out in the car before the bag is down, or a reply sent from the school parking lot to a meeting that could have waited until morning. Catching it early is much easier than catching it late.
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Notice the habits, not the hours
Hours are a poor measure, because the split week already makes your day strange. Look at what you reach for first. If you check work email before you check the kids' messages, or before you have looked at the house, the boundary is moving. Ask yourself whether you could go one afternoon without knowing what came in.
Separate what is urgent from what feels urgent
Most work messages can wait until your next working block. Look at the last ten you answered from the car or the bleachers and sort them honestly. How many needed an answer that day, and how many needed one only because you were already holding the phone? That second group is where the boundary is slipping.
Check the rules you actually agreed to
Find out what your manager expects for response time and after-hours contact, and whether it is written anywhere. If the expectation is vague, ask one plain question: what response time do you need from me when I am off shift? Get the answer in writing if you can. You are comparing your habits to the job's real rules, not to a worst-case reading of them.
Pick one line to hold this week
Choose one change you can keep, such as the phone stays in the bag until the kids are in the car, or work email is off during dinner. Keep it for a week and see what breaks. Usually very little does, and the people who need you know how to reach you in a real emergency.
If the split week already feels like a second job, the About this desk page explains how these guides are meant to be used.